


The What Ifs

by reigningqueenofwords



Series: Petty Insults [121]
Category: Avengers, Marvel, Thor - Fandom
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:35:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22567165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reigningqueenofwords/pseuds/reigningqueenofwords
Relationships: Thor x Wife, bucky x steve, clint x nat, tony x reader - Relationship
Series: Petty Insults [121]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/850284
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	The What Ifs

_ “I shall do that.” He nodded. “And us?” He looked at you, almost hopeful. _

_ You face him a sad smile. “You’re married. There is no us anymore.” You teared up. _

_ He teared up as well. “I’ll always love you.” He said gently, brushing his knuckles along your cheek. “Always.” _

_ “I’ll always love you, Thor.” Your voice broke. _

* * *

Thor and his family enjoyed watching everyone celebrate the twins’ birthday, but it was bittersweet. Thor had missed so many years with his son, with Ben, with you, with his Midgardian family, and his heart ached. Feeling a hand on his arm, he looked to his wife. She gave him a small smile before taking his hand in hers. “It would seem the young Starks, and the young Barton are taking to our girls.” She said, trying to give him something positive to look forward to. He looked to where the youngest children were playing and teared up. “Talk to me.” She urged him. 

“I cannot help but wonder.” He started softly. “How many of these children would be mine had the bridge not failed us.” He swallowed, looking back to her. “I love you, and our daughters. Do not question that, but I think that will always hang over me. The what ifs.” It wasn’t like that was new information. He’d always been honest with her. 

“You still love her.” She said gently, there was no malice in her voice. “I think I always knew, but I can see how you look at her, even now.” She went on. “And she loves you very much.” She squeezed his hand. 

He sighed, nodding. “She told me as much.” He said softly. “But, understands I am married. Said there is no ‘us’ anymore.”

“How do you feel about that?” She wanted to help him work through his emotions. “You can be honest, my love. I won’t be angry.”

“You are never angry.” He smiled softly, then it fell. “I do not know what I expected her to say, but it wasn’t that.” He said honestly. “Not after what we had.” 

She nodded. “Perhaps you should speak to her about the matter again…” She said softly. “Let her sleep on you being back, and speak with her tomorrow.” 

Thor looked at her. “And what if she says she wishes to have that again?” He asked, knowing his wife. That wasn’t something that she would ever agree to. 

She gave him a soft smile. “I believe we know both of our answers, dear.” She rubbed her hand softly on his arm. 

* * *

You kept yourself busy, always moving during the party. You couldn’t afford to stop. “Water?” Tony offered you, causing you to jump. “Sorry.” 

“It’s okay. Just trying to keep busy.” You shrugged, taking the water. “Thanks. Looks like all the kids are having a blast.”

He smiled and nodded. “They are.” He glanced at them, then back at you. “How are you feeling?” That was his priority. “You doing okay?”

You took a deep breath. “I don’t know.” You said honestly. “How am I supposed to feel?” You asked him. “Because this isn’t a situation that I ever thought would happen. I had honestly thought I’d die without ever seeing him again.” It was a hard thing to say, but it was the truth. “I told him I’ll always love him, but he’s married. There’s no ‘us’ anymore.”

“Yeah.” He said softly. “It is a curveball.” He agreed, looking at his glass. “He loves you very much, sweetheart. Doubt he ever stopped either.” He knew if he was in Thor's shoes, he never would have stopped. 

“Doesn’t matter either way.” You told him. "It's been fifteen years. We're monogamous, and I'm almost completely certain they are, too." You moved to wrap an arm around him, leaning into his side. "The only thing I'm hoping for is him and Heimdall to bond."

“I’d be willing to have that conversation if need be.” He kissed your head. “But I want that too, for Heimdall.” He told you. "So much. He's why I worked my ass off making Thorbot. If I couldn't get that damn bridge open, I'd give him the next best thing." 

You smiled. “And I know he appreciates it so much.” You looked up at him lovingly. "Especially because he knows that it took you so long. That you never stopped working on it for him." He kissed your forehead, smiling softly. 

“May I steal her, Stark? For a moment.” Thor’s voice came and he smiled at the inventor. 

Tony gave his friend a smile and a nod. "I'll go make sure our kids aren't breaking anything." He said teasingly as you raised an eyebrow at him. "I know, I know, they get that from me."

“They sure do, mister.” You chuckled.

Thor motioned to an empty area. “Take a walk with me?” He asked, sounding almost shy. 

You nodded, sipping your water. "Sure." 

He led the way, eyes focused on the ground as you both walked. “I was speaking with...my wife…” He began. “And she made me confess the emotions I am feeling being reunited with you.” He said softly, almost as if he was afraid to scare you away. 

You looked up at him as you both stopped walking. “Yeah?” You swallowed, urging him to continue. You were scared she would want him to return to Asgard and never come back. 

He nodded. “She encouraged me to tell you how I feel.” He sighed. “It is not easy, nor will it become easy, but do you have any hope for us?” He motioned between you both. "Even the tiniest bit?"

"I kept hoping you'd come back, and as time went on… I stopped believing I'd ever see you again. I honestly thought I'd die without the bridge ever opening again." You explained. "Tony and I are monogamous, but he said he'd be willing to have a talk about that. I can't see your wife being okay with anything, even if she wants you to tell me how you feel. I'm afraid to hope for anything more than you and Heimdall getting to know each other."

He nodded, searching your eyes. “If it was simple, would you wish to be together again?” 

Your heart was pounding in your chest as you nodded. “Yes.” You said quietly. 

He beamed and his eyes got glassy. “Then we shall make it so.” He declared as itf that's all it took. 

“Thor. It isn’t simple.” You told him. “You have a family. I have a family. Those families may not be ready to mix.” You sighed. "It may blow up in our faces." 

“Let it. When I found out I could travel home to you and our son, it was the happiest moment of my life. Nothing else matters. My wife understands that.” He explained. “She knows you and I have limited time in midgardian years.” The thought saddened him that he had already lost so many! "I spoke to her about the what ifs that will haunt me. What if I hadn't gone, what if the bridge had not closed… how many more children would we have had? How many more memories?" He reached forward to cup your face. “My love for you has never been stronger.” His voice broke. “I cannot see myself returning to Asgard.” He admitted. "Not without fear it would close again. I will not lose you and my sons again." 

You teared up as well. “You sound so sure. How do you know it would be okay?” You asked. "We would all need to sit and talk. You, me, your wife, and Tony." 

“As soon as possible, then.” He rubbed your cheeks with his thumbs. "Tonight, if possible? Or tomorrow? Do the children have school?" 

"The twins don't start until next year." You explained. 

He nodded. “We will have plenty of time to catch up.” He beamed. "I cannot wait to hear stories about all the children!"

You nodded. “They’ll really love you. The younger ones, too.” You squeezed his arm. "Thorbot acts, and talks, exactly like you. So they should warm up to you right away." 

“A very interesting concept.” He noted. "May I see this 'Thorbot'?"

You nodded. “Sure.” You lead him deeper inside. "JARVIS, where is Thorbot at the moment? Lab?"

“Yes. Shall I wake him?” JARVIS responded. 

"Please. Alert him I will be there." You lead Thor to the lab. 

Thor was eager to see his replacement. "How long did it take him to build?" He asked, curious. 

"Ten years or so." You told him. 

He raised his eyebrows. “And he is close with Heimdall?” He wanted to hear everything. "Stark, I mean." 

You nodded, smiling. "He is. Many of his inventions have been for him. The Holograms, Thorbot, stuff for him to tinker with." 

Thor nodded. “And Ben? How is he?” He asked, eager to hear. "Are they still close?"

"Ben is good. He takes after Steve. He's an artist. And they are, but also very independent." You said as the two of you stepped into an elevator. "They both look after the younger kids." 

He smiled. “Tell me about the younger ones.” He said gently. "They are certainly Starks!" He chuckled. 

You smiled. “They sure are.” You said lovingly as you began telling him about each child. Stepping into the lab, you were greeted by a smiling Thorbot. "Hello." You greeted him.

Thor watched intently as the two of you interacted. “Stark did a fine job.” He complimented. "Marvelous!" 

“He never replaced you.” You looked up at him. "He was a bandaid."

He nodded with a sad smile. “I have missed you so much.” He sighed. "I hope that there are many pictures and such for me to see." 

“Tons.” You smiled. 

“And things with the Captain…” He was trying not to imply anything. “Are okay?” He noted he was clearly happy with Bucky. 

You sighed, nodding. "I hated him for awhile…" You admitted, explaining how a very young Heimdall knocked Tony out and everything that happened after. “It was very hard.” You swallowed. "Then when Tony and I got married, things with Steve got worse."

He frowned, growing protective of you with ease. “What did he do?” 

"Him and Bucky had the boys for the week. They pawned Heimdall off on Clint and Nat. Made it sound like he was a problem, taking away his toys and electronics. Apparently, he had been making it storm at bed time to get their attention."

Thor clenched his jaw, eyes growing just as stormy as the memory you shared. “Have they made our son feel unworthy? This whole time?” He would be speaking with them if that was the case. 

You shook your head. “Both Tony and I laid into them. I called them assholes.” You admitted. “But, things have gotten a lot better. Especially with all the kids. I helped them when their twins were born, because they were in so over their heads.”

He shook his head. “I am glad they are better. You are such a great mother. To any child.” He said fondly. "Do you plan to have more Starks?"

"No, Tony had a really bad panic attack when he found out we were having twins. Literally hit the floor and wound up in the hospital. I don't think he could hand more. And I do have five kids. That's a lot." You chuckled. "Plus I help with three others."

He nodded. “I understand.” He knew was being too hopeful with your possible future together. "Shall we return to the others? And you can show me everything tomorrow?" 

“Sure. And we’ll see about that talk.” You nodded. "Your old floor is still unused, by the way. So you guys can sleep there. I'll get something for each of your girls to sleep in."

“You’re very thoughtful. May I kiss your cheek?” He asked, not wanting to overstep any boundaries. When you blushed and nodded, he smiled. He gently placed a hand on your shoulder before softly kissing your cheek. "Thank you for speaking with me."

“Of course.” You smiled shyly. 

* * *

Once back at the party, you chuckled as Tony had a twin on each leg, and Talia on his back. “I need a nap.” Tony joked. 

You shook your head, going to take Talia off him. She grinned up at you once she was set on the floor. "Daddy's being silly!" She giggled.

“Per usual.” You said lovingly. "I see Annabelle and Theo are enjoying themselves!"

They giggled up at you. “Play momma!” Annabelle smiled. 

Thor smiled fondly at how happy Tony looked, a far cry from when you first found out about Heimdall. He could tell everyone had grown one way or another. Feeling a small tug on his hand, he looked down to see his eldest daughter. "I'm tired." She told him. “Nap? Please?” 


End file.
